Unconventional Holidays and Your Goals

The holidays - a time often filled with indulgence and odd sleep hours. As a sleep coach, you might expect me to advocate for a strict ban on sugar, alcohol, big meals, and other common holiday elements that aren't exactly sleep-friendly. However, not only am I rarely a fan of strict, all or nothing, anything, especially in coaching, but in my experience occasional deviations from the norm - especially for good habits you aim to maintain long-term, like optimal sleep, can actually enhance your progress not hinder it.

Let me give you a personal story: From the age of four, my dream was to become a ballerina. I was fully committed to this dream, dedicating countless hours to training and rehearsal, despite knowing there was no guarantee of ever securing a professional contract. During my high school years, it was common to have five hours of classes and rehearsals five days a week. One regular afternoon, my classmates and I exited the locker room, passed the large bulletin board plastered with paper studio schedules and headed towards just another 90-minute class with another 2 hours of rehearsal ahead.

As we were making final adjustments to our pointe shoes, our teacher entered without the usual accompaniment of the piano player, which was unusual and instead was carrying a box of cookies. She then surprised us by instructing us to remove our shoes and sit in a circle in the center of the room - a first for us. She explained that she felt we needed a break. Truthfully, we were exhausted, our feet blistered (as usual) and mentally drained from mid-term exams happening that week. The spontaneous decision to just sit and chat - sharing stories, dreams and simply relaxing over some 'forbidden' snacks - was incredibly rejuvenating. And to note, half of this particular group of bunheads went on to healthy professional careers in top ballet companies just two years later.

This break from routine allowed us a moment to simply connect and take a breath from the usual intensity of performance pressure and critique. You may be wondering what this has to do with the holidays. If you are anything like me, the holidays of past have been usually laden with extensive planning, a jam-packed schedule, a careful balancing of finances and self-imposed pressures to craft the 'perfect' holiday experience - resulting in anything BUT a restorative experience for myself. But then a few years ago, I decided to flip holidays on their head.

Now, if grand holiday productions are your preference, by all means, maintain those traditions. But if the holidays zap the life out of you, just when you need them to be a golden day-off from the normal grind and giving you the restorative connection you desire...what if you allowed yourself to redefine your holidays to truly mean "vacation", in the European sense of the word? What would an ideal break from the monotony look like for you, even if it still incorporated sleep disruption and indulgence? What if you kept your favorite parts and did away with the stressful stuff?

Integrating occasional - and ideally spontaneous - indulgence can help you maintain focus on long-term goals and provide memorable 'experience points' that enrich your life. Not many moments from high school stand out to me like that one unexpected break. Maybe you can even coordinate with someone in your life to help create that element of surprise for you, if that would help to make a fun break happen. Trust that if 90% of your efforts support your goals, the occasional deviation will not only NOT be a slippery slope to failure, but can actually remind you of the true dynamic nature of motivation, connection and rewards.

--kim